9. BUT DON'T CALL ME A LIAR

SO TECHNICALLY breaking promises is not the same as lying either. Yes, I still haven't continued reading. I TRIED to finish On Writing yesterday, but I was actually quite busy doing my APUSH outlines, which I am also behind on. So my history book is what I've been reading for the past few days, and I've learned a lot. I also finally memorized the original thirteen colonies. (I swear I really did memorize them but actually listing them here would take too much space and you probably wouldn't believe me anyway cause I still could've looked in the book or something.) Anywho, another reason I was quite busy is because I was in Napa yesterday. I was SUPPOSED to go hot-air ballooning this morning but the darn unusual weather "did not permit!" So that sucked. What a waste of waking up at 4am! And yet another reason to call me a liar because I already told everyone I would be on a hot-air balloon today and that is not true at all. At least it wasn't my fault, but yeah.. darn these few days of weird summer rain! 

8. LIARS PROSPER

That was on the first page of On Writing. So even though I agree, I would like to make one tiny confession: I haven't finished reading ANY of those books yet. Ohh, aren't I hilarious. Well you see, before summer started, I arranged myself a carefully scheduled calendar. And if I consistently follow that schedule, I should be done with all my summer work by the middle of July. BUT I seem to have underestimated my amazing ability to procrastinate. I tried to stay on schedule as best as I possibly could, so even when I didn't finish a book by the assigned date, I started another book anyway. Goodness gravy I should be done with all of them by now and outlining Chapter 3 of APUSH, but I'm procrastinating on that too. SO I think I'll start.. finishing How to Read Literature Like a Professor now. P.S. I was never even lying in the first place. Withholding information is not the same as being dishonest. 

7. TAKE ME TO THE MOVIES

I AM SO EXCITED TO SEE HARRY POTTER OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS. Anywho, I'm still reading On Writing. It's pretty entertaining reading about Stephen King's childhood. I found another thing we have in common: I love movies too! If I could go back in time, I would probably go to the 50s. I would have loved to go to the movies and see a "Poepicture!" I know I've seen remakes, but I don't think I've watched many of those originals from the 60s. I love the genre: scifi and horror and stuff like that, and anything related to Edgar Allan Poe I'll probably like. Anyway, I was a little surprised when he said he didn't like Disney movies. Well I suppose I wasn't THAT surprised, knowing the kind of stuff that he writes, but.. everyone loves Disney! "Snow White and the Seven Goddam Dwarves"... well I don't really like Snow White too much either. I guess it wasn't his fault that the first Disney movies he was exposed to weren't the best. Okay I don't know if I'm defending Disney or attacking it, so I'll stop now. Oh, you know what my favorite line from a movie based on a Stephen King story is? "Oh Billy! I think i just turned my Fruit-of-the-Looms into a fudge factory! Oh Billy!!" -Stand By Me

6. DON'T REMIND ME

So now I'm reading On Writing by Stephen King. I love Stephen King, so I was excited to read one of his books this summer, even though it's not one of his horror stories or anything. Anywho, I just got through the part where he talks about his childhood illnesses. That part really entertained me. I'm not a sadist and enjoy other people's misery or anything, but I loved how I could relate. Every six months for the past eleven years of my life, I feel like torture always awaits me at the dentist. The dentist for me is like Stephen King's "ontiologist." My whole life so far has been cavity fillings and tooth extractions and braces ripping up my gums. Also, I had to get my wisdom tooth removed last summer (they kept calling the procedure a "surgery," which made me so much more scared than I already was), and that was the worst two weeks of my life. The "surgery" only took a few hours and they put me to sleep, but the time spent before and after was just horrible. I won't go into detail, but I did write a story chronicling my experience for an English assignment last year, just letting you know. So anyway, while I thoroughly enjoyed that chapter of this book, it did bring back some pretty horrible memories. Which I did not enjoy. 

5. DON'T BE A HERO

That's MY job. Don't worry, dear citizens; I'll save the day! Not really. But I wish. My life is so boring, I just wish I was a superhero or something. I still like to pretend. But I think I'm pretty close! When I was a kid, I always wanted to be the brave one, because all the other kids were too scared. I would be the one to turn on the lights in a dark room, while my friends were too afraid to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. If I was in a movie, I would be the one who would try to be a hero right after someone yells, "Don't be a hero!" I would be that stupid girl in horror films that audiences get frustrated at because she opened the closet. The only thing I'm truly scared of is the dentist. But I think that's such a ridiculous thing to be scared of, so I refuse to be afraid of anything else. I try my best to keep this up, but "Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid." I hope no one sees right through me. Anywho, I was trying to blend my little life story with what I've read so far in Into the Wild. This Chris McCandless guy must be pretty darn brave to give up everything to go live in the wilderness. Or maybe he's just crazy. I'm yet to find out his motive. Hmm, what else did I want to comment on? Oh yeah, I think his assumed name is pretty hilarious. 'Alexander Supertramp'... I laugh whenever I read it. Now THAT is a proper superhero name. In other news, the Giants won today! And.. congratulations Dallas.

4. SO CONFUSED

So I started reading Into the Wild. I was so confused! I know the guy's name is Christopher so I kept wondering who this Alex guy was. I had to read like, 3 chapters before I figured out that CHRISTOPHER was just telling people his name was ALEX. I hope that's what's going on. I'm right.. right? If I'm not, then I'm going to feel really stupid when I find out what's actually happening. Anywho, yesterday was Johnny Depp's birthday! I was planning to have myself a little movie marathon, but sadly, that didn't happen. HOW UNFORTUNATE! Anywhat, I went to the sale at Bath and Body Works and got A LOT of lotion. Like.. 5 bottles. And more stuff too! THEY SMELL SO GOOD. OH MY. Anywhy, the blister on my hand popped today. It's pretty gross and it hurts. But I've had that thing for months so it better heal already!

3. LISTEN! ARE YOU LISTENING? I'M LISTENING.

Bang! How many people are dead? Ohh, I love that game. I just recently learned it. You know what else I recently learned? The word "metonymy." How to Read Literature Like a Professor has gotten a lot more intersting now that it's moved on from all that talk about symbolism and rhetoric. I'm sure I'll read more about that stuff later on, but for now, I'm enjoying the show. Anyways, I've learned quite a lot so far. I've learned that sonnets are square and that Shakespeare is the most influential man in literature. INTERESTING STUFF, THERE. INTERSTING STUFF. I keep spelling the word "interesting" wrong. I always forget the other E. Anywho, I just ate my last green velvet cupcake. I made 30 on Sunday. I didn't eat ALL of them by myself (I gave away 12), but 18 cupcakes in 4 days isn't the best kind of diet a person could be on. I'm going to gain like, 20 pounds this summer. Another random fact: I'm wearing my PE clothes as pajamas. Yay for no PE! But that's probably another reason I'm going to continue gaining weight next school year. Goodness gravy. 

2. UNGREAT EXPECTATIONS

I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. And my parents are always bothering me about it, because I'm a junior and it's almost time for me to go to college and I need to start thinking about my future and whatnot. I'm still unsure. But one thing I'm sure I do NOT want to be is a literary professor. No offense to English teachers or anything, but sorry.. I'm simply not a very big fan of this particular job. It's a little too much work for me, a little too much thinking. (I must sound like a pretty lazy person. I admit, I AM a bit of a procrastinator, and I know that statement doesn't make the best first impressions, but trust me, I always try my best! Okay, I'm rambling again.) At least, that's what this book has shown me. How to Read Literature Like a Professor.. interesting book; I'm halfway through. But I'm just saying, I don't necessarily agree with each and every concept presented. TOO MUCH SYMBOLISM. TOO MANY PATTERNS. I am yet to analyze a novel myself and already I am thoroughly confused. I know the class will teach me plenty more about reading, and I might even want to pursue a career in literature someday, but right now, I already know that as an adult, I will not voluntarily choose to read literature like a professor.

1. BE WARNED

Hello World and all who inhabit it! So before I actually start blogging about all my summer reading and whatnot, I would just like to formally warn you of the things that go on in my crazy mind. I've never tried blogging before because I knew that the entire thing would just be rants of my boring, everyday life, and random thoughts that I happen to come across. My mind wanders aimlessly, so be prepared, because I WILL go off topic all the time and these posts will usually be unnecessarily long because I talk way too much about weird things that I always wonder about. This was an example. This post was useless and lengthy and I apologize in advance for what I have to put you through this entire summer. Wish me luck! And I wish the same for you. Adventure Time!